Being Bubba’d is bad for you
Bubba is the tool of Malketeers. I’ve heard marketeers refer to their customers as Bubbas.
Malignant Marketeers – i.e. Malketeers - control Bubba’s with hacks, levers, and lies.
Bubbas react more than think. Bubbas hit levers for hacks. Bubba’s accept marketing deceit as truth.
Don’t be Bubba’d into bad decisions.
Bubba - friend
Bubba is a great friend. He’s funny. You like to be around him. He has an appetite for life. He doesn’t like to wait. He has said “hold my beer - watch this,” and lived to tell the tale. Bubba is a big guy, way over his ‘glory days’ playing weight. He doesn’t play sports now, he likes to watch and talk about them.
My Favorite Bubba and I at the Derby.
He’s not actually the “Worlds Biggest Jockey.”
He’s a great guy who will be having serious health issues if he doesn’t make changes.
Bubba – Consumer Persona
Marketeers like to create a customer persona, a personification of what their typical customer’s age, sex, height, weight, job, education, family, goals, hobbies, challenges – and they give this fictional person a first name.
I once went to a presentation at Mobil Oil when they were discussing their convenience store business model. Mobil’s customer persona was a guy in a hurry, he didn’t want to go the grocery store and deal with a big parking lot, big store, and slow lines. He wanted to get in, buy some food, beer, or cigs, and get out. He was only price sensitive for three items – milk, eggs, and bread – everything else could be priced higher than a grocery store.
Their ideal customer was impulsive and profitable:
They called this fictional customer - Bubba.
At the time, I felt smug and thought the label was funny. Twenty years later, when I realized I was Bubba, it wasn’t as funny.
Bubba - Obese Rat Mascot
It’s not just convenience stores, all malketeers are trying to Bubba you. The malketeers and designers of every part of the TCU (Tasty-Cheap-Unhealthy) food supply chain want you to Bubba react to their offerings.
Example: Walmart stores have soda in the soda aisle and about twenty other places. Do they sell eggs, broccoli, or apples in 20+ places? Soda, snacks, and candy - check-out aisle impulse items - have high profit margins. Walmart puts profits before consumer health and therefore systematically Bubbas their customers to make bad decisions.
Because TCU marketeers have hacked our instincts, taste systems, and emotions, if we make food decisions instinctively – “What do I want to eat?” “What sounds good?” “That smells good!” – we are the human equivalent of an obese rat in a maze - fat, hungry, and frenzied - hitting levers. Bubba’d constantly.
Frenzied! Beyond food, malketeers using hacks, levers and lies Bubba us into other addictive and destructive habits – news, smoking, alcohol, drugs (legal and illegal), gambling, sex, gaming, shopping, social media, smart phone apps, and computer algorithms. Profits come from heavy users. It is the malketeer’s job to create heavy users, turning the profit ratchet.
Daycart “Bubba, please stop letting them harm you.”
Bubbas -vs- Daycarts
Bubbas’ think by reaction:
What do I want right now?
What looks, smells, or sounds good?
What’s the quickest way to stop discomfort?
Daycarts’ think through situations:
What should I do?
What’s best for my mind and body?
What discomfort will I overcome to achieve my goals?
Team Descartes - We think, therefore we win - health, fitness, energy
BONUS: Bubbas - VS - John Smiths
I wondered “Am I being unfair to Bubbas, are there any Bubbas famous for their genius in an area like philosophy, math, or health coaching?
After research I concluded - NOPE. The famous Bubbas are performers, athletes and politicians.
I used a generic common name to use as a Bubba comparison - John Smith.
As a benchmark, John Smith and Bubba have about the same number of famous US athletes.
Famous Bubbas
The most famous ‘Bubba’ is President Bill Clinton – A brilliant politician who’s also famous for poor control of his sexual desires. He was the most powerful man in the world – still, sex was his hack, his weakness, and a lever named Monica entered the oval office. His Bubba desire for flirting and a blow job overwhelmed his ability to think clearly. Probably, the most expensive blow job in world history. It almost cost him the presidency.
Wikipedia’s famous Bubbas by profession: Famous Bubbas are athletes and performers.
Musician: 4 (Jazz tenor saxophonist, Rockabilly singer and dancer, Soul singer and member of Gladys Knight & the Pips, Southern rapper)
Baseball player: 4
Football Player: 4
Basketball Player: 1
Professional Golfer: 2
Motor Sports: 3 (Motorcycle, Motocross, Stock car)
Politicians: 2 (Louisiana politician, Arkansas politician and 42nd President)
Performers: 2 (Star on A&E's Storage Wars: Texas, Radio talk show host)
Bubba - John Smith Comparison
Contrast Bubbas with Wiki’s list of famous Americans with the bland name: John Smith.
The number of famous John Smiths in US Sports is about the same as Bubbas:
John Smith(US): Baseball-4, Football-6, Basketball-2, Golf-0, Motorsports-0 = 12
Bubba: Baseball-4, Football-4, Basketball-1, Golf-2, Motorsports-3 = 14
The John Smiths in other areas far exceeds the number of Bubbas.
John Smith(US): Military-5, Artists/writers-4, Academics-6, Religious-5, Politicians-39, Other-7 = 59
Bubba: Military-0, Artists/writers-0, Academics-0, Religious-0, Politicians-2, Other-2 = 4
Conclusion
Greatness, in fields beyond sports, music and politics is hard to achieve if you’re a Bubba.
Outstanding US generals, professors and writers might’ve started as Bubbas, but none achieved greatness as a Bubba.
“Go Team – See, Think, Win!”